Anatomy of A Bigamist

Not all of men's affairs are for just sex or even love. Many are for the satisfaction of secrets that the husband/boyfriend has not shared with the wife/girldfiend.

The Internet has become a common ground for sharing viewpoints, both pro and con. As more people are tuned in to the electronic age it has become increasingly more difficult for the bad practices of any business, no matter how remote or small their marketplace is, to continue without being noticed, as has been the case until now. People of all levels and of experience have increasingly begun to share their opinions concerning the various pluses and minuses of various businesses. Many businesses are not coming out well in these news group discussions. Same for many people.

When one is married to more than one that's bigamy, a felony. When one is having an affair while with another while married, that's adultery.

“A guy who's got the chutzpah to try to pull the wool over somebody's eyes. That's a good definition of a bigamist,” said University of Cincinnati clinical psychiatry professor Linda Chernus.“One (spouse) is hard enough,” joked Chernus, who has researched bigamists and believes generally "they have such low self-esteem that they marry multiple spouses to compensate with a sense of “grandiosity. They need to control women, to keep secrets and keep autonomy so no one knows what's going on inside of them,” Chernus said.“There may also be some underlying insecurity.“(Bigamists) have a sense of invincibility that they can get away with this. They think they can get away with anything,” she said.

Example: Surreptitious Male of Many Secrets, one James "Jim" K. Olson, College of Marin California Band Director, music teacher Redwood High School Marin County California, Neil Cummins Elementary School Marin County California, Henry C. Hall Middle School Marin County California, ballroom dance instructor City of Novato, California, bigamist, cross-dresser.

The consequences of his bigamy is that the mercurial Jim Olson is now widely rumored to be the inspiration for Flip/Flopper John McCain, who left his wife after she was horribly disfigured in an accident.

Where each uncovering of layers of meaning to the truth led inevitably to tragedy http://www.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3947.

"According to Aristotle , tragedy requires, among other things, a character that many once admired greatly, but who always possessed a secret, resulting in his hamartia, which is the fall of a once noble man caused by some excess or mistake in his behavior. Hamartia is related to hubris and it inevitably leads to deadly errors in judgment. That character inexorably falls from happiness into misery as their peripateti c situation progresses due to his hubris , which totally blinds him in his relentless pursuit of another's destruction. The total effect of the unfolding of the real truth invokes dismay and horror because in the end comes his anagnorisis : the recognition or uncovering of his tragic error. When at last he sees the truth, it is too late for he had achieved his desired destruction." http://losangeles.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3947.

"Make any statement that is so true that it has been staring us in the face all of our lives, and the whole world will rise up and passionately contradict you. If you don't withdraw and apologize, it will be the worse for you. But just tell a thundering silly lie, and a murmur of pleased assent will hum up from every quarter of the globe." George Bernard Shaw.

Truth/Flip: In February 1982, the soon to be Mrs. & Mrs. James K. Olson meet at a Redwood High School basketball game in Larkspur, California when they are introduced by one of his band students. That student thought they just might like each other. The student, Kim Perrotis, was the daughter of Redwood's Spanish teacher John Perrotis. Love at first site, the Olsons then live together as husband and wife happily ever after for the next 9 years. Flipper Jim certified their husband and wife living together on their February 16, 1991 Lake Tahoe, California marriage certificate.

Lie/Flop: Liar/Flopper Jim chose a HL California Confidential Marriage Certificate http://sf.broowaha.com/article.php?id=2900 for their February 16, 1991 marriage.

Flip: Flipper Jim and Mrs. Olson live happily ever after.

Flop: A month later Flopper Jim files for a divorce and restraining order against Mrs. Olson, while Flipper Jim continues sex with her.

Flip: Flipper Jim withdraws his first divorce and first restraining order. Flipper Jim and Mrs. Olson live happily ever after.

Flop: In 1992, while still Redwood High School's Music Teacher Flopper Jim has a variety of misconduct charges against him by his Dominican College student teacher Cindy Wood. Flopper Jim files for a second divorce (FL 6764) and second restraining order making same allegations against Mrs. Olson while Flipper Jim continues sex with her. Being tired of Flip/Flopper Jim, Judge Michael Dufficy orders marital counseling.

Flip: Although the Marin courts have no record of it, Flipper Jim says he withdrew his second divorce and second restraining order (FL 6764), and Flipper Jim and Mrs. Olson live happily ever after.

Flop: A couple months later, August 31, 1992, Flopper Jim files for a third divorce (FL 7442) and third restraining order making same allegations against Mrs. Olson while Flipper Jim continues sex with her. Mrs. Olson foundout when she came home from college to discover that Flopper Jim had packed her up, moved all her things into their RV, rented a space at the college's student housing's trailer park, set up utilities, phone, and honey wagon, all in Flipper Jim's name. Flopper Jim then had her served, but Flipper Jim spent nights with her at student housing. When caught by lawyer Cora Lancelle, to divert attention, Flopper Jim filed a false Twin Cities police report that his car had been stolen. Flopper Jim "forgets" to tell the police that the woman he told them had stolen his car was his wife, that the car's title is in both of their names so she can't steal her own car, the insurance on that car is in both their names, and that the telephone number Flopper Jim gave the police to contact her at is in Flipper Jim's name. When the police contact her, she proves all these points to the police. The police then tell Flopper Jim filing a false police report is a misdemeanor. Mrs. Olson refuses further action against Flip/Flopper Jim. The next morning Flopper Jim calls the Twin Cities police to report he was driving in to work and saw his car off to the side and had recovered it undamaged. A miracle it was! Judge Michael Dufficy orders marital counseling. Flopper Jim admits in counseling he keeps divorcing his wife as he enjoys the increasingly intense level of emotion and sex brought on each time as he forces her to repeatedly prove she really loves him. That he finds it exciting when she "fights" for him. That sounds like an entry for The BrooWaha Sex Survey http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3661.

Flip: Flipper Jim then immediately sold the RV, moved his wife back to their Sausalito home. Mrs. Olson found out when she came home from college to find the RV gone and the student housing manager told her that her husband had removed it. Flipper Jim withdraws his third divorce and third restraining order in March 1993. Flipper Jim and Mrs. Olson live happily ever after.

Flop: Eighteen months later, in 1994, Flopper Jim files for a fourth divorce and fourth restraining order with same wild and crazy stories against Mrs. Olson but doesn't get restraining order as his credibility was a big fat zero with everyone.

Flip: In July 1995, Mrs. Olson buys a house in Reno and moves there August 1995 with Judge Dufficy's blessing who wishes her "best of luck with Jim." In September 1995, Flipper Jim, as expected, follows Mrs. Olson and reconciles with her forthe fourth time in July 1996. Flipper Jim says he withdrew his fourth divorce in July 1996. Flipper Jim and Mrs. Olson live happily ever after. Flipper Jim lives in Reno every other weekend, holidays and summers. Mr. & Mrs. Olson both wear their wedding rings, the Olsons tell friends and colleagues in Reno they are husband and wife. Flipper Jim gets homeowners insurance in his name with him as the primary, certifies Mrs. Olson as his wife and puts her on as additional insured on the Reno house. March 2000, Flipper Jim forges her Olson name in his purchase of a car in Marin County, California. Fall 2000 Flipper Jim executes a Nevada Living Trust with Mrs. Olson, and signs his acknowledgement of their plan for his early retirement with moni!
es she gave him and her future retirement back to Marin County in their home there. Mrs. Olson had learned and now made Flip/Floppier Jim put everything in writing.

Flop: After 10 1/2 years of that time living happily after, with no Flops, now together 25 Flip/Flop years, in October 2006, Mrs. Olson gets a call from a woman that Flip/Flopper Jim died. Seems Flip/Flop Jim had been Caught In A Double Life when Mrs. Olson sent him two $10,000 checks in September 2006. On October 19, 2006, Flopper Jim wrote a letter to Mrs. Olson that he is married to someone else and has been for a couple years!?! In it, he also wrote he voided the two recent $10,000 checks that Mrs. Olson had sent him per his recent request. The ones that exposed his Double Life.

Flip: Flipper Jim writes Mrs. Olson several love letters.

Flop: Flopper Jim breaks into their Reno home after Mrs. Olson changed its locks. According to TMCCs Pat Slavin and TMCC police, Flopper Jim also tried to break into Mrs. Olson's TMCC locker. Flopper Jim was desperate to get all his original signature agreements that Mrs. Olson had learned to make him do.

Flip: Through attorney Jill K. Whitbeck, a 2008 Reno Better Business Bureau member, in Spring 2007, the Nevada Mrs. Olson files for a divorce in Reno. Flipper Jim hires Drama Queen of The First Order John Springgate, (a future Among Us story in his own right, and not a 2008 Reno Better Business Bureau member) for the Reno Mrs. Olson's divorce from Flip/Flopper Jim to be dismissed. That's right. Dismissed. How bout that? Flipper Jim doesn't want a divorce from the Reno Mrs. Olson! Add to that Flipper Jim admits in court papers that July 1996 he reconciled with Mrs. Olson in Reno.

Flop: Flopper Jim obtains a default ro with a falsified service date and proceeds forward with his million dollar!? strike against Mrs. Olson for his stupidity for being caught as a bigamist.

Flip: In Summer 2007, Flipper Jim is successful at getting Mrs. Olson's divorce from him dismissed. Roger with Eagle Electric sees Flipper Jim with Mrs. Olson happily together at their Reno home, further invalidating Flopper Jim's now known to be fraudulently obtained default ro.

Flop: Flopper Jim . . . coming soon

Flip: Flipper Jim . . . coming soon

Flop: Flopper Jim . . . coming soon

Flip: Flipper Jim . . . coming soon

Sources and further readings: Washoe District Court, Marin County (California) Superior Court, Reno Nevada Police Department reports, Twin Cities (California) Police reports, Sausalito (California) Police reports, Marin (County California) General Hospital medical reports, Now You Call It Madness (But I Call It Love ) http://sf.broowaha.com/article.php?id=1873, A List of Questions I Promise Not To Pose http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=1905, Cheaters Among Us, Olson http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3334, California's Legal Secret Marriage Racket http://sf.broowaha.com/article.php?id=2900, Get All Those Instructors You Can Or Maybe No t http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=2887, Bigamists Among Us, Olson. http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3481, Pure Sleaze http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3511, Feasting at the Public Trough http://sf.broowaha.com/article.php?id=2763, The Dirty Little Secret of Ballroom Dance http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id!
=2840, Gun Controllers Among Us, Marin County California Courts http://reno.broowaha.com/profile.php?id=1516.

Cross-dressing is much more than a "preference to wear the other gender's clothes." Cross-dresser James K. Olson is an example I have some knowledge of http://reno.broowaha.com/article.php?id=3630. Cross-dressing follows an evolving pattern. That pattern starts when he (vast majority of cross-dresser are male) is a young boy. It is that pattern that enslaves him. It starts with a secret. A secret that involves the X chromosome within him. A secret that is a COMPULSIVE OBSESSION. A secret known as the cross-dressing fetish. A fetish that often grows, among other things, to excite him to rape a female. A fetish that then may silence females by strangulation literally or through legal abuses based on elaborate and bizarre lies so she can never tell about his secret and COMPULSIVE OBSESSIONS.

In the San Francisco BrooWaha is a story, Now You Call It Madness http://sf.broowaha.com/article.php?id=1873. It has much about what colors darkly every aspect of one's life, here Jim Olson's, in his pursuit of a freedom, his obsessions and compulsions, that he kept secret from his wives.

This comment is from Tamara, a UNR psychology grad student.

"Cross-dressers statistically are often pedophiles. Bondage often is associated with pedophiles. Teaching is a profession that tends to attract pedophiles. Personality disorders such as cross-dressing, leather, vinyl, rubber, bondage fetishes, is characterized by rigid and on-going patterns of thought and action fixed fantasies. The inflexibility and pervasiveness of these behavioral patterns often cause serious personal and social difficulties, as well as a general impairment of functioning.

Personality disorders are defined by the American Psychiatric Association as "an enduring pattern of inner experience and behavior that deviates markedly from the expectations of the culture of the individual who exhibits it". These patterns, as noted, are inflexible and pervasive across many situations, due in large part to the fact that such behavior is perceived to be appropriate by that individual.

Transvestic fetishism is defined by as one of the paraphilias, a group of mental disorders characterized by obsession with unusual sexual practices or with sexual activity involving nonconsenting or inappropriate partners such as children. The essential feature of transvestic fetishism is recurrent intense sexual urges and sexually arousing fantasies involving dressing in clothing associated with members of the opposite sex.

Another term for transvestic fetishism is cross-dressing. Transvestic fetishism is considered a sexual deviation. For transvestites stimuli associated with cross-dressing is just about always necessary for erotic arousal and are always included in sexual activity, if not actually acted out alone or with a partner. It is important to note that this activity is closely associated with achieving sexual gratification. Persons with transvestic fetishes should not be assumed to be homosexual.

According to DSM-IV-TR, most men who practice cross-dressing are basically heterosexual in their orientation. Some, however, have occasional sexual encounters with other men. Cross-dressers often choose to hide this part of themselves and sometimes internalize a sense of shame and guilt as psychiatrists and society still consider cross-dressing to be pathological. Persons with transvestic fetishism rarely seek psychotherapy on their own account. In rare instances, the patient has agreed to consult a psychiatrist only because his wife or girlfriend is distressed by the cross-dressing.

Most persons who have a transvestic fetish never seek treatment from professionals. The prognosis for treatment of transvestic fetishism is poor, as most persons with this disorder do not desire to change. Most cases in which treatment was demanded by a spouse as a condition of continuing in a marriage have not been successful. By the way, it was German physician Magnus Hirschfeld who coined the term "transvestism" (Latin for "cross-dressing") in 1910. Hirschfeld was himself a cross-dresser.

Cross-dressing is a fetish, along with the rubber, vinyl, leather, and bondage fetishes. A cross-dresser can't get excited without cross-dressing or pretending he is cross-dressed or with the woman on top while he pretends to be the woman. That's when therapists describe it as a fetish. A fetish is an eroticized object whose use is crucial to a person's sexual function as it provides psychological stimulation. Cross-dressing is only one of many fetishes. When both people in a couple are interested in the same thing - she likes to be on top, he likes the bottom, he's ecstatic when she wears vinyl, the issue of narrow erotic interests doesn't seem like a problem.

It's when one person gets bored with the routine, or never liked it in the first place, that couples have difficulty. Many women originally start out trying to please his fetishes because she doesn't realize what they are, fetishes. She thinks eventually they'll get to a more normal relationship not realizing that will never happen. A true fetish - a long-term, rigid requirement, or more than one doesn't change. Then he acts out with a variety of partners usually women desperate for a husband and young girls he can coerce due to his position in their lives, like as their teacher.

Most cross-dressers have Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) as NPD is a defense against shame. It is defined as a mental illness primarily characterized by extreme focus on oneself, and is a maladaptive, rigid, and persistent condition that may cause significant distress and functional impairment. There is a preoccupation with fantasies. They believe that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by other special people. They have a strong sense of entitlement to the point they will take advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends. They lack empathy and are arrogant to hide that they are easily hurt, oversensitive, ashamed and over react hiding that hides in a generic state of shame obsessed with neutralizing devaluation by seeing other, usually their spouses and employers as unjust abusers. As a coping strategy, the cross-dresser avoids sharing "shameful" thoughts and feelings with partners and significant others due to fear of rejection so they behave in a critical or superior way toward others.

Most cross-dressers are also The Peter-Pan psychological type characterized by immaturity or certain sorts of psychological, social, and sexual problems. The type of personality in question, usually male, is immature and narcissistic

The characteristics of include irresponsibility towards one's spouse, rebelliousness against one's spouse, pottering about, anger, narcissism, manipulativeness, and the belief that he is beyond society's laws and norms. It is the adult little boy who, when in a relationship or in seeking a relationship, acts out a need for mothering. It is useful to compare the Jungian archetype of Puer Aeternus, the eternal boy.

Cross-dressers also often have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): "a pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image and affects, as well as marked impulsivity, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts." It is marked by frantic efforts by the cross-dresser to avoid real or imagined abandonment including repeatedly divorcing their spouse. Cross-dressers have patterns of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation due to their persistently unstable cross-dresser identity disturbance. There is Impulsivity like promiscuous sex, eating disorders, binge eating, or reckless driving. There is recurrent self-mutilating behavior. There is inappropriate anger often acted out in passive aggressive. It has been noted that there is probably no other mental disorder about which so many articles and books have been written, yet about which so little is known based on empirical research.

Studies suggest that individuals with BPD tend to experience frequent, strong and long-lasting states of aversive tension, often triggered by perceived rejection, being alone, or perceived failure. Individuals with BPD may show lability (changeability) between anger and anxiety or between depression and anxiety and temperamental sensitivity to emotive stimuli. The negative emotional states particularly associated with BPD have been grouped into four categories: extreme feelings in general; feelings of destructiveness or self-destructiveness; feelings of fragmentation or lack of identity; and feelings of victimization. Individuals with BPD are very sensitive to the way others treat them, overreacting strongly to perceived criticism or hurtfulness. Their feelings about others often shift within minutes from positive to negative, generally after a what others look at as a minor disappointment or perceived threat of losing someone.

Self-image can also change rapidly from extremely positive to extremely negative. Impulsive behaviors are common, including unsafe sex and recklessness in general. Attachment studies suggest individuals with BPD, while being high in intimacy- or novelty-seeking, can be hyper-alert to signs of rejection or not being valued and tend towards insecure, ambivalent, preoccupied or fearful attitudes towards relationships. They tend to view the world generally as dangerous and malevolent, and themselves as powerless, vulnerable, unacceptable and unsure in self-identity. Individuals with BPD are often described, including by some mental health professionals (and in the DSM-IV), as deliberately manipulative."

Mistress Doctor (MD), a former San Francisco dominatrix, now Novato, California psychologist wrote:

"That domestic violence from the man is a characteristic of all male cross-dressers marriages or relationships who fail to immediately disclose their secrets. Once outed, all these men turn it on its head and claim it's the wife who is the abuser, the mentally unstable one. Those secrets, deception, manipulativeness, selfishness, playing the victim, deceit, narcissism, arrogance, control, and drama, are all characteristics of all cross-dressers. The more closeted they are, which usually happens as they age, the deeper and darker the characteristics."

Tamara:

"Their secret, their fetish, or menu of fetishes, are compulsive needs. A male closeted cross-dressers sex life with an adult female is usually brief and mutually unfulfilling to the cross-dresser and his female partner. Often times he is even impotent as the male cross-dresser gains more sexual satisfaction from being cross-dressed and masturbating in front of a mirror as the cross-dresser is chained to his fetish.

A cross-dresser who simultaneously expresses his fetish and sex with a female child gains fulfillment. Intercourse with a female child while cross-dressed gives him more sexual satisfaction than his masturbating cross-dressed in front of a mirror. That leads me to a disturbing hypothesis of why many child abusers kill the girl. Is it in order to keep his cross-dressing secret? The comments about how San Francisco, a town known for tolerance, is not tolerant of cross-dressers, but is of drag queens, which are homosexual, were telling. The conjecture is that a cross-dresser is more concerned with keeping his cross-dressing secret than the discovery of his sex with a child.

The cross-dresser is unconcerned about the discovery of his sexual act as it proves he is a man who is able to perform. The discovery of his cross-dressing though brings into doubt his masculinity. Like the child abuser who kills the child, both are unconcerned about their sexual act. Both are proud of themselves as a man who was able to perform. It is their secret that they will do anything to protect. For that reason, serial abuse and domestic violence is done to protect the secret that he is a cross-dresser."

Another MD comment:

"Self-centeredness and selfishness are cross-dresser characteristics. Therefore, cross-dressers are Masters at Appearances/Deception with years of experience Hiding Their Secret. The older the cross-dresser, the more likelihood of his having a Double Life. From the viewpoint of psychology, he is often a Serial Abuser. His behavior is often Domestic Violence."

copyright 2008 Craig B
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